From the outset, the lyrics of “In Control” were initially inspired by my decision to attend a death experience workshop.

I was rather expecting I’d get to lie in a coffin for this experience; but all I actually got to do was listen to what was effectively a guided meditation through one’s funeral, then committal, and then towards a symbolic rebirth (which was, admittedly, what I sought out of that in the first place). I’d like, however, to think that every night I go to sleep and wake up, is in a sense, a cycle of death and rebirth.

The verses effectively mirror each other, both making reference to the classical elements (fire, earth, wind, water in that order), with a tacit acceptance of the unrelenting demands of life and a need from respite therefrom.

When I wrote the choruses, I wanted to incorporate a countermelody along the lines of “Noroshi” by MyGO!!!!! [1], albeit within a more limited scope to avoid overcomplicating the song. Something I noticed in “Noroshi” was that for the countermelodies in the chorus to work, the lyrics had to roughly parallel each other and use the same words. I wasn’t really content having two contrasting parts that substantively were identical, but I needed certain words to sound the same – so I relied instead on a little wordplay.

The several references to Emily Dickinson in one iteration, originated from me meditating (I’ll be real and call it ruminating) over her poem, “If I can stop one heart from breaking” – in particular the refrain that “I shall not live in vain”.

For the record, I re-discovered that poem while cosplaying as the singer Robin from “Honkai Star Rail”; one of Robin’s songs, likewise titled after the poem, is also a deliberate reference to it.